How To Strengthen Your Connection With Others…..And Possibly Fall In Love
“Hi, how are you?”
“I’m fine, how are you?”
“Yes, soooo busy.”
…… awkward silence.
Resonate? For most of us it would.
We dread that awkward silence associated with small talk, yet often struggle to move beyond first base to the next level of connection.
And we’re missing the opportunity to really get to know the person we’re talking to. Their story. Their values. Their passion.
I’ve previously challenged us to embrace BIG talk, using Conversation Sparkers – questions that add a spark of interest to our chats.
You’d be surprised at how simply asking “what’s been the highlight of your day?” or “working on anything exciting?” can lead to stimulating conversation, even with strangers. Not to mention a hit of those pleasure and bonding hormones of dopamine and oxytocin. Check out some great Conversation Sparkers here, thanks to communication expert, Vanessa Van Edwards.
What about taking your relationships, and friendships, to a higher level? Digging deep into their purpose and motivation in life…. Up for it?
Here are 36 questions that will bring you closer together. Okay, I’ll fess up…they were actually designed by social psychologist Arthur Aron to have you fall in love with anyone, as you’ll see here.
Not up for love? You can choose which questions to ask depending on the level of intimacy you want to take that connection. Hugs not necessary.
Here’s a sample of the starters which are safe to use on friendships, even acquaintances. And dialling up excitement to your conversations.
- Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
- What would constitute a perfect day for you?
- For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
- If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
So here’s the challenge – try a few of these questions that you’re comfortable with, on people you really want to get to know.
And try all of the questions on someone close to you at the right time and place. Who knows what will happen!